the main players today

The Krab Katich – batted like he has all year, took the facebook kid nice byrce to get him out. Was in control for most of the day, but is out now, and cannot hurt us for a day or two.

Phabulous Phil – seems to have lost all touch at the moment. Lucky he had the Krab free flowing at the other end, because he was stuck in a hole, hole, holeee, and it was deep, deep, deeeeep. Siddle eventually ended his innings.

Once in a generation Clarke - looked bubbly, fresh, alive, in control and went out on tea just when his team really needed him. Perhaps he thought he was still playing for Australia where that sort of behaviour is tolerated.

Their brad – was a little flighty early on, but then he took complete control, and although he never looked like taking the game away from victoria he did look like he was gonna make it uglier. Then he went out in the last over of the day.

Brett Lee – spent all day ducking and weaving, getting hit, slashing to the boundary before Dirty dirk bowled a ripper.

Dirty Dirk – was brutal early on, pretty good with the reverse swing, and then looked tired and flat with the second new ball. But still angered one through the crease to end Lee’s day and set up Victoria for tomorrow.

Peter Siddle - is about 20 has had more shoulder operations than a centre half forward, but somehow he just picks up wickets like other people pick up socks. Another 4 today, and I’ve seen him bowl a lot better as well.

The facebook kid Nice Bryce – not his best day, but he dines on Krab tonight.

Angry man Harwood – bowled some good spells, but is still the bet when it reverse swings.

The Big bear – Captained well, no matter what the fox sports team said, and bowled pretty well. Also seemed to have a new cap on.

Our Brad – dropped catches, miss fields, falling over and generally making me laugh.

Victoria takes on the IPL

According to economists the market is the true indicator of life itself.

I think most economists are massive wankers, but since this theory suits my theory I am willing to use it.

According to the IPL auction David Hussey and Cameron White are worth more than Michael Hussey and Ricky Ponting.

Don’t give me any of that that’s because they might not be available for the whole tournament, cause neither will Brett Lee, and he still got a big bag of cash.

So the Market forces have spoken, Future PM comes in for his Brother King Probot, and Cam comes in as skipper ahead of Michael Clarke.

Simon Katich should continue to be ignored.

Ok perhaps this is a bit extreme, except the Krab Katrich bit.

But it does show the Victoria do have cricketers (and coaches) who are in demand, not in Australia, but internationally.

Even the ICL gave Ian Harvey a new mansion.

Offcourse not all Victorians were given cash, Brad Hodge was overlooked altogether.

Bradley will be picked up soon, because Loots Bosman and Ramesh Powar are playing but what about other Victorians.

Dirty Dirk Nannes – best 2020 domestic bowler, plus would be a great bollywood villain, starting price 800,00. But will need time off for snow boarding.

Andrew McDonald – Capable with either instrument, one of the most talented all rounders in the world. Also great marketing opportunity for McDonalds in India. 650,000.

Aiden Blizzard – ADD afflicted opening batsmen that has hit balls out of the Waca and radelaide oval. Headlines are easy to write. 575,000.

Bryce McGain – Blue Rinse leg spinner of unmeasurable talent. Probably the greatest leg spinner of all time, wait I’ll check, yup, best I can remember. IT specialist as well, they will come in handy in India. 525,000.

Adam Crosthwaite – improvising batsmen, and talented keeper. If not selected for his playing ability should get the nod for his commentary. 450,000.

Shane Harwood - if the IPL turns into the wrestling showcase it wants to be, who better than Harwood as the fast bowler who hates everyone, assuming he stays fit. 425,000.

Ken Piesse – with this many Victorians over there, they will need a proper cricket journalist, and who else but Ken. 150,000.

Jrod – I have already applied as chief blogger of the IPL. 900,001.

350 odd

I could give a detailed report of the game where Victoria smoted NSWales.

But really, the game was over the minute Future PM David Hussey (sign the petition) went out to bat.

NSWales lost the toss, and the 5 spinners they had were never going to concern such upstanding citizens as Hussey, Hodge and Quiney.

The good news is that Tasmania will have seen us make 350, Dirty Dirk and Harwood got through the match unscathed and will be better for the runner.

This is most I’ve seen of Darren Pattinson, and he worries me, not as a bowler, as a bowler I like him, but on the way in to the wicket he seems to almost close his eyes, I’m afraid he’ll do himself a mischief.

Now onto Tasmania, to play against the butler and his crew.

Perhaps we will even have a fit crew for once.

gallant

Victoria held on for a gallant draw today.

I’m not sure what a gallant draw is, but that’s exactly what they managed.

Mark Cameron and Beau Casson, absolute champions of world cricket, just scraped together 18 wickets between them.

Which is a great sign for Victoria as Cameron may not even get a Guernsey for the final.

Beau Casson took 7 wickets in the match, which probably makes him favourite for the Pakistan tour.

Lets look at what this drawn game means for Victoria.

They are now guaranteed a spot in the final. Woohoo.

Cameron White almost made back to back 50’s. Not bad.

CWB’s Nice Bryce took 5 wickets, and if he had a bit more time could have made a real mess to the NSWales tail. Conjecture.

We still have Harwood, Denton and Nannes to come back. Hopefully.

McDonald continued his resurgence from injury, taking wickets and making runs. Shane who?

Hodge and Hussey continued to be Hodge and Hussey, which is a good and bad thing. Nothing new.

Now let us forget the weird NSWales selections, their obvious cheating to get Hussey out of the side, and the fact two nobodies bowled us out on their own and look forward to taking on the Tasmanians in the Holden Barina cup.

George Bailey beware.

day one from bizzaro world

I hate catches down the leg side.

I can never tell if they are out, and it’s just a sh1t way for a batsman to go.

Today Hussey went out on the last ball before tea, caught down the leg side, off Dominic Thornley.

If that isn’t enough to slit your wrists over, he was on 86.

Then Hodge does the same thing off Beau Casson, mind you his pain was less cause he made a ton.

Mind you by then Victoria had used the flat wicket to score more than enough runs for one day.

6 for 340 on the first day is better than a slap in the face from an angry woman.

Yet again the money men held us up, but at least Whitey made a fair dinkum contribution and we still have McDonald to bat with the tail.

The weirdest thing for the whole day goes to the NSWelsh and their selection process.

The game was played at the SCG, as far as I’m aware. And yet when Matthew Nicholson, the 52 year old fast bowler, got ill before the game they replaced him with a debutant opening batsmen to bat at number 6.

Good luck to Usman Khawaja, but he obviously wasn’t going to take the new ball.

I’m glad the kid got a go, but isn’t it odd, that they would replace a bowler with a batsman.

NSWales only has 2 full time bowlers in this side, the game they have to win to get a home final, how stupid is that.

Beau Casson had none for 58 off ten at one stage, he may have been a full time bowler once upon a time, but no more.

Moises Enriques is a kid with more talent than Spiderman, but he is still young and is nowhere near a first tier bowler.

So if it is a home game, and Nicholson came down with the sniffles, why would they not replace him with another bowler, it defies all logic, unless we are in bizzarro world, are we in bizzaro world?

The Vics are in a good position, but their bowling line up scares me.

McKay and Pattinson may be good bowlers, but at this stage I do not have a zealotry belief in their talents.

However if we get to 450 tomorrow and then bowl them out for 83 I’ll prostrate myself before them.

Brad's Vs David

In the Victorian Herald Sun today there is just a little tid bit about Haddin, Hodge and Hussey and who could be in the one day side.

They compare one day domestic records, where Hodge and Hussey tower above Haddin.

I think my love for Future PM Hussey is will known, and my hate for all players named Brad is equally well known.

This may come as a shock to you, but I think Brad Haddin should be playing in this one day series.

Brad managed to get into the Australian team last year, he did so by making a lot of runs quickly.

Then with injuries he found himself playing in India in the 7 match series that made no sense.

In that series his average of 66 in 4 games was only second to the man they called monkey.

He was on fire that series, while the other Brad made 59 runs in 7 matches at 9.

This is why Brad Haddin has been picked ahead of Brad Hodge in this series.

As for why Haddin has been picked ahead of Hussey it’s this simple, a) he is going to be a full time member of this side and this is good practice, and b) he made 200 runs at 66 in his last series so dropping him for a debutant, even one as God like as David Hussey is a big call.

When Gilly goes another batting slot will open up and the Future PM is the obvious choice for it.

If he doesn’t get picked then, and Bryce doesn’t get picked for a tour soon, I suggest all Victorians bum rush the Cricket Australia headquarters next to the G and burn that fu©ker down.

I have my pitch fork ready, but until then, chillax Victoria.

New Texas defeated

Ashley Noffke turned out to be more benign than I thought, and therefore the Vics won easy.

The Mc's all took wickets, the pressure they put on the Bulls was quite good, the perssure the bulls put on themselves was unbelievable. They scraped to 200odd.

Then after a small yet slightly scary collapse (3/50), Brad Hodge and Cameron white saved our @sses.

Hodge made a pretty cruisey hundred, and while he did most of the damage, White kept his huge county bat sheathed until he deemed it necessary to slog some quick runs.

And did he slog, he hit some balls that are so scra4ed the ball's children will grow up petrified.

It was a welcome return to form for both men, who while they haven't been out of form, they haven't been their usual belligerent selves.

Also good to see the Vics win easily with Future Pm David Hussey pretty much a spectator.

Clinton McKay still worries me. He just seems loose, and not the in the bimbo sense of the word, but in a fast bowling I think he can get hit for a big shot at any time.

He is getting wickets so I am happy to say this is more my issue than anyone elses, but when he takes the new ball I feel a little nervy.

No royal commission required

Memo to all fans of Victorian Cricket

There is no conspiracy

There is no selectoral bias

There is no grassy noll theory.

And the CIA has nothing to do with this.

Victoria does not have a player in the Australian team, because at this time there is no spot for a Victorian in the Australian team.

Test wise, only two Victorians are currently in the form to play for Australia, the other three are not quite there.

Future PM David Hussey is in breathtaking form at the moment. But the King Probot Hussey, Pup and Roy are all making runs. Generally selectors don’t drop guys making runs, I have stated my thoughts on Michael Clarke being dropped, but we all know they aren’t going to drop him on my recommendation.

CWB’s Nice Bryce McGain is the other player playing at the level of test match standard. He has two hurdles to over come, one is old agedness and two his lack of a first class record. Is he a better bowler than Brad Hogg, king oath, but he is not at Staurt MacGill’s level either.

Brad Hodge has not had a good year (except for the runs he made against a new texas eleven with 2 fit bowlers counts) and would now be behind Hussey, Katich and Pomersbach in the selectors mind. Plus do we really need more Brads in the side.

Peter Siddle is in good form, but he has only played 3 matches and Doug Bollinger had taken 2 ten wicket hauls this year at roughly the same average.

Had Andrew McDonald replicated last years form he would be very close to selection by now, but he hasn’t due to injury and therefore is down the list. Noffke is in superstar form and would be ahead of him at the moment anyway. Plus he does have red hair.

One day wise we were unlucky not to have a player in the side.

David Hussey is unlucky again, but the only batsman, I repeat batsman picked ahead of him is Brad Haddin, who on his last tour with Australia smashed the Indians everywhere. It is hard to drop a guy who performed so well the last time he played. Domestically Hussey has had the better year, but only marginally. Every other batsman deserves his spot ahead of Hussey at this stage.

Brad Hodge, well he had his chance in India, and he batted horribly. The selectors have picked the player in Haddin who made the runs there. He now finds himself on the list behind Hussey and perhaps even Voges, but Pontings love for the man means he could leap frog them if there is a spot available, especially if it is a top order spot.

McDonald hasn’t been in sensational one day form, but you know who has, Noffke and Hopes. And they were selected because of that fact. Case closed.

Dirty Dirk Nannes & Bryce McGain were the two best 2020 bowlers in the big bash, both are over 30 and one is injured.

If Nannes was fit I would have hoped he would have got a call up for the 2020 game ahead of Hilfenhaus, but he isn’t and there fore not in the side.

This isn’t all bad news, because this is the first Victorian team we have had in quite some time that has had multiple players with a shot of making the main team.

I didn’t even mention Cameron White or Aiden Blizzard, one who has played and one who in the future could be a chance.

But let us not be whiney little babies, as this means we have a full strength state team to pick from for the rest of the year.

And by then someone in the Australian middle order will be injured and Hussey will be there.

day two

Due to bad captaincy, good bowling, a sick wife and general ©rap Victoria found themselves 6 for about a 100.

Luckily Hodge and McDonald found them selves together at that odd position and they both flailed the Redbacks around for a session and a half to get Victoria back to level pegging.

First innings points are nice, but I was more concerned they would end up 100 runs shy and therefore outright points would have been a long way away.

The last few times I had seen McDonald bat I had been a bit worried about his form.

One of those times was in the nets before a 2020 game, but he still looked ugly.

This game he has really proved his allroundedness, with 4 wickets yesterday and 139 today.

It was a great rear guard knock, one that really got us back in the game, but he must have p1ssed at going out and leaving Cricket With Balls Own Bryce McGain to try and scamper for first innings points.

It’s a tough game cricket, some times 139 is still not enough.

The Brad Hodge wife thing is interesting, all day I was trying to work out how he could have been fit enough to bat last night, but too injured to bat this morning. When he did get to the ground he had a bit of a scrappy start before really taking charge with McDonald.

As usual the Vics lost multiple wickets, and as usual they played their best cricket when they were in all sorts of Barney Rubble.

It’s an important two days for the Vics, cause you can’t really afford to lose to the Redbacks.

drunken big bash report

This match report is soaked in beer.

Myself and my friends drank at a 2020 pace.

Big Daddy, a not so frequent collaborator on cricket with balls woke me with a spew this morning, that’s the sort of pace we set last night.

The game was pretty ordinary.

Another G pitch that no one could score runs on.

Which for 2020 sort of negates the idea of the game.

Blizzard and Hodge looked pretty good early on.

But when talking about batting you really can’t look much further than David Hussey. How he scored 70 off 40 on that pitch is beyond me.

He hit some very large blows, and looked particularly angry against the slower bowlers.

I still maintained my perfect record of never seeing him make a tonne.

Just to prove how good David Hussey is the NSWelsh came out and batted horribly.

I still don’t know how they got that close to winning.

The crowd was great, it was great to see a Victorian cricket match with fans there.

Never thought I’d see the day.

I'd like to thank Cricket With Balls Own Nice Bryce McGain for getting a wicket first ball as a birthday present.

What a great guy.

Victorian blizzard warning (murdoch approved headline)

Aiden blizzard is set to make his debut for the Vics next week.

I’m pretty happy with that, having seen him a few times now I think the boy can bat, and I think the sooner he gets into the side the better. He has a solid technique and a good eye. Making your debut on the fairy floss wicket down south aint bad either.

Will be interesting to see where he bats in the order, whether Future Pm David Hussey moves himself to 3, or whether Aiden comes in as a direct swap for Hodge.

Problem is he’s playing because Brad Hodge has been promoted to play 2020 cricket for Australia.

My question would be, what is the point of playing a near 33 year old in a one off 2020 match?

Surely Brad Hodge would be better off playing first class cricket for his state so he can get back into the test side (theoretically).

Not swinging his bat like a mad man so that cricket Australia can make some quick cash and channel 9 can try out new toys.

I’m not sure why people over the age of 25 need to even play 2020. I’d prefer Blizzard, Pomersbach or someone untried to have a go.

Either 2020 is a real form of cricket, and the best team plays (not drop out like Ponting did). Or it’s an exhibition game for add afflicted mtv fans, and it should be played by youngsters to get experience playing under pressure.

You can’t have your cup cake and eat it too.

shield wrap up - day 2

Victoria stumbled across first innings points. Brad Hodge didn’t quite get his ton, but he did get his groove back. Hussey and Jewell both got starts, but they didn’t go on to really press home Victoria’s advantage. The best red headed all rounder in Australia made sure Victoria got the points.

The game is still there abouts for Tassie, if they can plough through Victoria’s amazingly fragile looking tail.

Hodge and Hussey need to make hundreds not 50’s and 90’s if they want to push for selection. Remember boys, selection is only a hamstring strain away.

For Nsw, Simon Katich made a hundred to almost single handily beat South Australia on his own. These days you only need a player or two to beat them.

While for the warriors, Matthew Inness

31.4 19 38 5 1.20

destroyed Queensland, I checked the score at 5/215 and then I heard they were all out for 228. Their batsmen are now turning the screws on the game.

When Inness was a youngster (and a Victorian) he was a terribly exciting young cricketer, but over the years he struggled to take enough wickets and ended up outside the side.

From there he has struggled to be a permanent fixture in Wa, but he is now there with some other Eastern state bowlers, and he seems to be finding the wickets again.

things i forgot

More notes from the bushranger v warriors the other night that somehow I forgot to blog earlier.

Brad Hodge pulled a sharp bit of work in the field and then spent the next 30 seconds watching himself on the big screen, he looked quite impressed with his work.

You know it’s a quiet game when you have a your mp3 player in one ear and you can still clearly hear Michael Hussey tell David Hussey that he was dreaming after a big swipe off Sean Ervine.

Its such a shame to see Sean Ervine playing for the Warriors. I still remember him giving his all in the perth test where hayden temporarily borrowed Lara’s record.

This is victorias new mascot.

This is an actual photograph of Brad Hogg catching Adam Crosthwaite. Remember when Adam was going to be the next aussie keeper.


Oh and these photos are from my phone so obviously they aint great.