I’m willing to admit that the Victorian selectors know more than I do about who should be selected.
Even Ray Bright.
I am willing to admit that, but I still must say that when one is trying to win a home final and all but ensure a Sheffield pura Shield cup victory, one must take its best bowlers.
According to media scuttlebutt (always wanted to use that word), Dirty Dirk Nannes and Gerard Denton are fit.
Yet, they are not playing Western Australia.
I understand this is some sort of operation cotton wool, keep the boys fit for the final.
But if they final is played in Sydney, reanimating the corpses of Ponsford & Miller may not help against a test strength NSWales.
In Melbourne I think we can win, even against Lee, Clarke, Clark, Jacques and Bracken.
In Sydney, not so much.
Today’s fast bowling line up is still pretty strong, Harwood, the Mule Wise and Lucky McKay.
It’s not a bad line up, but Dirty Dirk and Denton stroll into that line up, and Dirty Dirk likes the Waca.
Just a little odd is all.
Oh and I don’t really think the selectors are cleverer than me.
Friday, February 29, 2008
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Bryce - the wizard of oz
The game was a final.
The game going, going, g……
Victoria had fallen apart with the bat, David Hussey aside.
Dirty Dirk, Clinton and Harwood had done everything in their power, but the rain, and the circumstances were saying the game was over.
The score had got to 5/109 chasing 131.
I aint no mathematician, but I’d say that’s about 21 runs short.
Cameron had lost a bunch of overs from his quicks thanks to Duckylewis.
Bryce was the only front liner left, and he hadn’t bowled an over yet.
Victorian leg spinners have a good record under pressure in finals, well one of them does.
Bryce looked chubby, but that was cause he was wearing 4 tops, Tassie had turned very chilly.
Straight away he took a wicket, it wasn’t a spectacular ball, it probably bounced a bit more than Diven thought and he skewed it to point.
6/109.
Still a long way from a victory, but there was something happening.
Then two balls later he slides a ball past Xavier Doherty, who had a brain snap that would make OJ Simpson cringe.
7/109.
From there on in Bryce looked like he was bowling cluster bombs, one of which hit Geeves so straight in front Gilly and Jesus would have walked. Geeves didn’t, and was given not out.
Luckily for the Vics Dirty Dirk finally finished off Geeves and Bryce was left with Brendan Drew.
8/127.
Brendan is a big hitting tail ender, but against Bryce he looked like a drunken kitten.
Byrce didn’t have it all his own way with Drewy, the first edge he got was too sharp for Crosthwaite.
Luckily enough next ball he got a more manageable edge straight into the centre of his gloves, Bryce is nothing if not considerate of others.
9/128.
Bryce only had two balls left against Hilfenhaus, the first was a probing nut right at him.
Hilfy played it quite well.
The next ball, McGain threw it wide, remember even Muhammad Ali makes mistakes, and Hilfy looked quite good whilst leaving the ball.
And that was it.
McGain had done everything he could do.
5 overs.
2 maidens.
3 wickets (have not included Geeves due to bad LB call)
11 runs.
The next ball was edged by Turtle Birt, the dud Victorian who became the handy Tasmanian, and all of Bryce’s magical tricks were forgotten as the Tasmanians danced around the ground.
The wizard was left to stroke his beard.
BTW how cool would Bryce look with a long white beard.
The game going, going, g……
Victoria had fallen apart with the bat, David Hussey aside.
Dirty Dirk, Clinton and Harwood had done everything in their power, but the rain, and the circumstances were saying the game was over.
The score had got to 5/109 chasing 131.
I aint no mathematician, but I’d say that’s about 21 runs short.
Cameron had lost a bunch of overs from his quicks thanks to Duckylewis.
Bryce was the only front liner left, and he hadn’t bowled an over yet.
Victorian leg spinners have a good record under pressure in finals, well one of them does.
Bryce looked chubby, but that was cause he was wearing 4 tops, Tassie had turned very chilly.
Straight away he took a wicket, it wasn’t a spectacular ball, it probably bounced a bit more than Diven thought and he skewed it to point.
6/109.
Still a long way from a victory, but there was something happening.
Then two balls later he slides a ball past Xavier Doherty, who had a brain snap that would make OJ Simpson cringe.
7/109.
From there on in Bryce looked like he was bowling cluster bombs, one of which hit Geeves so straight in front Gilly and Jesus would have walked. Geeves didn’t, and was given not out.
Luckily for the Vics Dirty Dirk finally finished off Geeves and Bryce was left with Brendan Drew.
8/127.
Brendan is a big hitting tail ender, but against Bryce he looked like a drunken kitten.
Byrce didn’t have it all his own way with Drewy, the first edge he got was too sharp for Crosthwaite.
Luckily enough next ball he got a more manageable edge straight into the centre of his gloves, Bryce is nothing if not considerate of others.
9/128.
Bryce only had two balls left against Hilfenhaus, the first was a probing nut right at him.
Hilfy played it quite well.
The next ball, McGain threw it wide, remember even Muhammad Ali makes mistakes, and Hilfy looked quite good whilst leaving the ball.
And that was it.
McGain had done everything he could do.
5 overs.
2 maidens.
3 wickets (have not included Geeves due to bad LB call)
11 runs.
The next ball was edged by Turtle Birt, the dud Victorian who became the handy Tasmanian, and all of Bryce’s magical tricks were forgotten as the Tasmanians danced around the ground.
The wizard was left to stroke his beard.
BTW how cool would Bryce look with a long white beard.
Saturday, February 23, 2008
It takes a Victorian to beat Victoria
Cricket is a cruel mistress.
And not in the cool whipping you kind of way.
She all but takes you to the edge of the promise land, and then Travis the turtle Birt (former Victorian no hoper) gets an edge for 3.
I feel hollow inside, if Natalie Portman were in front of me right now, naked with a bottle of Canadian club, I couldn’t muster up the energy to have a drink, let alone avail myself of her nakedness.
Do you understand the depth of my sorrow.
Losing a game of cricket happens.
Losing a final against Tasmania happens (occasionally).
Losing a final against Tasmania when they are 9 wickets down and Byrce McGain is spinning a web of destruction at the other end does not just fu©ken happen.
Victoria decided on not batting in this game, David Hussey (sign the petition) aside.
Hussey is made of a scientific polymer substance that is resistant to heat, cold and Victorian collapses.
How the Vics got Tasmania 9 wickets down for 130 runs is insane, and it took a Victorian, Birt, to win it from there.
Tassie have a great bowling line up. Hilfenhaus, Drew and Geeves are all what Tony Greig would call broad shouldered men, who bowl above 140 clicks. Xavier Doherty, is a weird dude, but he can definitely bowl, and has the best stutter ball in world cricket.
The Vics just had one of those days, they batted when the wicket was playing up, they picked a probot (klinger) ahead of a batsmen (blizzard), they lost 12 overs though massive stupidity, the rain inhibited Bryce and tassie got the best of the rain delays.
At least they put up a hell of a fight.
McGain and Dirty Dirk at the end were outstanding.
Dirty Dirk Nannes (say it) is the hulk with a beard, a man so powerful a thousand tranquillisers couldn’t bring him down.
Mcgain is like a wonderful wizard, I think he should have a long white beard.
But even these great men couldn’t turn the game far enough.
Realistically this is only a one dayer, but still it hurts, oh does it hurt.
If I don’t take a bunch of sleeping tablets and sexually strangle myself I may talk about the last few overs and that man Bryce tomorrow.
And not in the cool whipping you kind of way.
She all but takes you to the edge of the promise land, and then Travis the turtle Birt (former Victorian no hoper) gets an edge for 3.
I feel hollow inside, if Natalie Portman were in front of me right now, naked with a bottle of Canadian club, I couldn’t muster up the energy to have a drink, let alone avail myself of her nakedness.
Do you understand the depth of my sorrow.
Losing a game of cricket happens.
Losing a final against Tasmania happens (occasionally).
Losing a final against Tasmania when they are 9 wickets down and Byrce McGain is spinning a web of destruction at the other end does not just fu©ken happen.
Victoria decided on not batting in this game, David Hussey (sign the petition) aside.
Hussey is made of a scientific polymer substance that is resistant to heat, cold and Victorian collapses.
How the Vics got Tasmania 9 wickets down for 130 runs is insane, and it took a Victorian, Birt, to win it from there.
Tassie have a great bowling line up. Hilfenhaus, Drew and Geeves are all what Tony Greig would call broad shouldered men, who bowl above 140 clicks. Xavier Doherty, is a weird dude, but he can definitely bowl, and has the best stutter ball in world cricket.
The Vics just had one of those days, they batted when the wicket was playing up, they picked a probot (klinger) ahead of a batsmen (blizzard), they lost 12 overs though massive stupidity, the rain inhibited Bryce and tassie got the best of the rain delays.
At least they put up a hell of a fight.
McGain and Dirty Dirk at the end were outstanding.
Dirty Dirk Nannes (say it) is the hulk with a beard, a man so powerful a thousand tranquillisers couldn’t bring him down.
Mcgain is like a wonderful wizard, I think he should have a long white beard.
But even these great men couldn’t turn the game far enough.
Realistically this is only a one dayer, but still it hurts, oh does it hurt.
If I don’t take a bunch of sleeping tablets and sexually strangle myself I may talk about the last few overs and that man Bryce tomorrow.
Friday, February 22, 2008
Victoria takes on the IPL
According to economists the market is the true indicator of life itself.
I think most economists are massive wankers, but since this theory suits my theory I am willing to use it.
According to the IPL auction David Hussey and Cameron White are worth more than Michael Hussey and Ricky Ponting.
Don’t give me any of that that’s because they might not be available for the whole tournament, cause neither will Brett Lee, and he still got a big bag of cash.
So the Market forces have spoken, Future PM comes in for his Brother King Probot, and Cam comes in as skipper ahead of Michael Clarke.
Simon Katich should continue to be ignored.
Ok perhaps this is a bit extreme, except the Krab Katrich bit.
But it does show the Victoria do have cricketers (and coaches) who are in demand, not in Australia, but internationally.
Even the ICL gave Ian Harvey a new mansion.
Offcourse not all Victorians were given cash, Brad Hodge was overlooked altogether.
Bradley will be picked up soon, because Loots Bosman and Ramesh Powar are playing but what about other Victorians.
Dirty Dirk Nannes – best 2020 domestic bowler, plus would be a great bollywood villain, starting price 800,00. But will need time off for snow boarding.
Andrew McDonald – Capable with either instrument, one of the most talented all rounders in the world. Also great marketing opportunity for McDonalds in India. 650,000.
Aiden Blizzard – ADD afflicted opening batsmen that has hit balls out of the Waca and radelaide oval. Headlines are easy to write. 575,000.
Bryce McGain – Blue Rinse leg spinner of unmeasurable talent. Probably the greatest leg spinner of all time, wait I’ll check, yup, best I can remember. IT specialist as well, they will come in handy in India. 525,000.
Adam Crosthwaite – improvising batsmen, and talented keeper. If not selected for his playing ability should get the nod for his commentary. 450,000.
Shane Harwood - if the IPL turns into the wrestling showcase it wants to be, who better than Harwood as the fast bowler who hates everyone, assuming he stays fit. 425,000.
Ken Piesse – with this many Victorians over there, they will need a proper cricket journalist, and who else but Ken. 150,000.
Jrod – I have already applied as chief blogger of the IPL. 900,001.
I think most economists are massive wankers, but since this theory suits my theory I am willing to use it.
According to the IPL auction David Hussey and Cameron White are worth more than Michael Hussey and Ricky Ponting.
Don’t give me any of that that’s because they might not be available for the whole tournament, cause neither will Brett Lee, and he still got a big bag of cash.
So the Market forces have spoken, Future PM comes in for his Brother King Probot, and Cam comes in as skipper ahead of Michael Clarke.
Simon Katich should continue to be ignored.
Ok perhaps this is a bit extreme, except the Krab Katrich bit.
But it does show the Victoria do have cricketers (and coaches) who are in demand, not in Australia, but internationally.
Even the ICL gave Ian Harvey a new mansion.
Offcourse not all Victorians were given cash, Brad Hodge was overlooked altogether.
Bradley will be picked up soon, because Loots Bosman and Ramesh Powar are playing but what about other Victorians.
Dirty Dirk Nannes – best 2020 domestic bowler, plus would be a great bollywood villain, starting price 800,00. But will need time off for snow boarding.
Andrew McDonald – Capable with either instrument, one of the most talented all rounders in the world. Also great marketing opportunity for McDonalds in India. 650,000.
Aiden Blizzard – ADD afflicted opening batsmen that has hit balls out of the Waca and radelaide oval. Headlines are easy to write. 575,000.
Bryce McGain – Blue Rinse leg spinner of unmeasurable talent. Probably the greatest leg spinner of all time, wait I’ll check, yup, best I can remember. IT specialist as well, they will come in handy in India. 525,000.
Adam Crosthwaite – improvising batsmen, and talented keeper. If not selected for his playing ability should get the nod for his commentary. 450,000.
Shane Harwood - if the IPL turns into the wrestling showcase it wants to be, who better than Harwood as the fast bowler who hates everyone, assuming he stays fit. 425,000.
Ken Piesse – with this many Victorians over there, they will need a proper cricket journalist, and who else but Ken. 150,000.
Jrod – I have already applied as chief blogger of the IPL. 900,001.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
350 odd
I could give a detailed report of the game where Victoria smoted NSWales.
But really, the game was over the minute Future PM David Hussey (sign the petition) went out to bat.
NSWales lost the toss, and the 5 spinners they had were never going to concern such upstanding citizens as Hussey, Hodge and Quiney.
The good news is that Tasmania will have seen us make 350, Dirty Dirk and Harwood got through the match unscathed and will be better for the runner.
This is most I’ve seen of Darren Pattinson, and he worries me, not as a bowler, as a bowler I like him, but on the way in to the wicket he seems to almost close his eyes, I’m afraid he’ll do himself a mischief.
Now onto Tasmania, to play against the butler and his crew.
Perhaps we will even have a fit crew for once.
But really, the game was over the minute Future PM David Hussey (sign the petition) went out to bat.
NSWales lost the toss, and the 5 spinners they had were never going to concern such upstanding citizens as Hussey, Hodge and Quiney.
The good news is that Tasmania will have seen us make 350, Dirty Dirk and Harwood got through the match unscathed and will be better for the runner.
This is most I’ve seen of Darren Pattinson, and he worries me, not as a bowler, as a bowler I like him, but on the way in to the wicket he seems to almost close his eyes, I’m afraid he’ll do himself a mischief.
Now onto Tasmania, to play against the butler and his crew.
Perhaps we will even have a fit crew for once.
David Hussey Petition
Please pop over to Cricket With Balls and fill out my petition to get David Hussey into the national side.
No excuses, get over there and do it, your Future PM needs you.
No excuses, get over there and do it, your Future PM needs you.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Siddle Injured
He has re injured his shoulder. So far it is unsure how NSWales are to be blamed, but trust me I'm on the case.
I have shaken the fast bowling tree, but nothing fell down, we have sucked the tree dry.
Now that there is actually no one left to take the new ball, Tony Dodemaide and Damien Fleming are to be reinstated for the next 4 day game.
It's a bold move by the selectors, but Ray Bright was heard to say, I want to play too.
Shane Harwood has apparently decided on not playing four day cricket, as he wants to continue to get paid the big bucks to play for Melbourne.
Dirk Nannes is recovering in Nagoya.
Gerard Denton has been missing for quite some time, I just saw his face on my milk carton.
Mick Lewis has left the building.
So i propose we do what NSWales did, we take only two bowlers into the next match and hope for the best.
I have shaken the fast bowling tree, but nothing fell down, we have sucked the tree dry.
Now that there is actually no one left to take the new ball, Tony Dodemaide and Damien Fleming are to be reinstated for the next 4 day game.
It's a bold move by the selectors, but Ray Bright was heard to say, I want to play too.
Shane Harwood has apparently decided on not playing four day cricket, as he wants to continue to get paid the big bucks to play for Melbourne.
Dirk Nannes is recovering in Nagoya.
Gerard Denton has been missing for quite some time, I just saw his face on my milk carton.
Mick Lewis has left the building.
So i propose we do what NSWales did, we take only two bowlers into the next match and hope for the best.
Monday, February 18, 2008
gallant
Victoria held on for a gallant draw today.
I’m not sure what a gallant draw is, but that’s exactly what they managed.
Mark Cameron and Beau Casson, absolute champions of world cricket, just scraped together 18 wickets between them.
Which is a great sign for Victoria as Cameron may not even get a Guernsey for the final.
Beau Casson took 7 wickets in the match, which probably makes him favourite for the Pakistan tour.
Lets look at what this drawn game means for Victoria.
They are now guaranteed a spot in the final. Woohoo.
Cameron White almost made back to back 50’s. Not bad.
CWB’s Nice Bryce took 5 wickets, and if he had a bit more time could have made a real mess to the NSWales tail. Conjecture.
We still have Harwood, Denton and Nannes to come back. Hopefully.
McDonald continued his resurgence from injury, taking wickets and making runs. Shane who?
Hodge and Hussey continued to be Hodge and Hussey, which is a good and bad thing. Nothing new.
Now let us forget the weird NSWales selections, their obvious cheating to get Hussey out of the side, and the fact two nobodies bowled us out on their own and look forward to taking on the Tasmanians in the Holden Barina cup.
George Bailey beware.
I’m not sure what a gallant draw is, but that’s exactly what they managed.
Mark Cameron and Beau Casson, absolute champions of world cricket, just scraped together 18 wickets between them.
Which is a great sign for Victoria as Cameron may not even get a Guernsey for the final.
Beau Casson took 7 wickets in the match, which probably makes him favourite for the Pakistan tour.
Lets look at what this drawn game means for Victoria.
They are now guaranteed a spot in the final. Woohoo.
Cameron White almost made back to back 50’s. Not bad.
CWB’s Nice Bryce took 5 wickets, and if he had a bit more time could have made a real mess to the NSWales tail. Conjecture.
We still have Harwood, Denton and Nannes to come back. Hopefully.
McDonald continued his resurgence from injury, taking wickets and making runs. Shane who?
Hodge and Hussey continued to be Hodge and Hussey, which is a good and bad thing. Nothing new.
Now let us forget the weird NSWales selections, their obvious cheating to get Hussey out of the side, and the fact two nobodies bowled us out on their own and look forward to taking on the Tasmanians in the Holden Barina cup.
George Bailey beware.
Stinks to high hell
How do you get David Hussey out cheaply?
You drag him from Sydney to Radelaide mid match, because a NSWelshman (uhum) has sore ribs.
Then when the sore ribs feel good enough to make a 70 odd in an international match, you send him back to the SCG where he can no longer bat at the number 4 spot he so beautifully patrols.
Now when it comes to Victoria I often get caught up in conspiracy theories.
But this is no conspiracy theory, this happened in front of our very own eyes like when Greedo shot first, we actually saw it all happen.
So what compensation do Victoria get today, being that the future PM averages about 70 something this season, and he was jet lagged out for 20 something, surely any Victorian total should be given a 50 run bonus.
That won’t happen though, because this is a conspiracy to ensure that Victoria do not get a home final.
Wake up people.
Who takes a player from a game, when a back up is already in the squad, and then sends him back again because he is not required?
This stinks to high hell. Have always wanted to say that.
But regardless of this, Victoria will prevail, because Victoria has something that NSWales can never have, Victorian spirit.
I’ve always wanted to say that as well.
Victoria are now in a dodgy position, but they did manage to tie on first innings yesterday, after giving the NSWelsh a partnership between a debutante and a teenager.
In true Victorian style they then took 3 for 3 and both teams were dead even on 394.
While it guarantees a final, the fact we let NSWales get that close is horrible.
And who the hell is this Cameron fellow, and why does he have 9 wickets?
They only took 2 bowlers into this game, and one of them has hardly got a cracker, and we still might lose.
I'm holding onto the words that keep popping up though, deteriorating pitch, they make me feel a little better.
Side note, Congrats to Michael Hill (greensbourough boy according to cricinfo) on his big score for the Strayan under 19 side.
Lets hope he becomes as good a player as Adam Smith or Clinton Peake.
You drag him from Sydney to Radelaide mid match, because a NSWelshman (uhum) has sore ribs.
Then when the sore ribs feel good enough to make a 70 odd in an international match, you send him back to the SCG where he can no longer bat at the number 4 spot he so beautifully patrols.
Now when it comes to Victoria I often get caught up in conspiracy theories.
But this is no conspiracy theory, this happened in front of our very own eyes like when Greedo shot first, we actually saw it all happen.
So what compensation do Victoria get today, being that the future PM averages about 70 something this season, and he was jet lagged out for 20 something, surely any Victorian total should be given a 50 run bonus.
That won’t happen though, because this is a conspiracy to ensure that Victoria do not get a home final.
Wake up people.
Who takes a player from a game, when a back up is already in the squad, and then sends him back again because he is not required?
This stinks to high hell. Have always wanted to say that.
But regardless of this, Victoria will prevail, because Victoria has something that NSWales can never have, Victorian spirit.
I’ve always wanted to say that as well.
Victoria are now in a dodgy position, but they did manage to tie on first innings yesterday, after giving the NSWelsh a partnership between a debutante and a teenager.
In true Victorian style they then took 3 for 3 and both teams were dead even on 394.
While it guarantees a final, the fact we let NSWales get that close is horrible.
And who the hell is this Cameron fellow, and why does he have 9 wickets?
They only took 2 bowlers into this game, and one of them has hardly got a cracker, and we still might lose.
I'm holding onto the words that keep popping up though, deteriorating pitch, they make me feel a little better.
Side note, Congrats to Michael Hill (greensbourough boy according to cricinfo) on his big score for the Strayan under 19 side.
Lets hope he becomes as good a player as Adam Smith or Clinton Peake.
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Too angry
I am way to angry to talk about a tied first innings result.
Especially when a teenager and debutante save the day on their own.
Especially when a teenager and debutante save the day on their own.
Saturday, February 16, 2008
day two from less bizzarro world
Victoria got themselves to 390 odd.
It wasn’t pretty, and the tail had to fight a bit, and some bloke called Cameron got a swag full of wickets.
Then NSWales got in and batted like they were batting for time.
Their failure to take more than 2 specialist bowlers into this side mean that first innings points is really important.
But the Vics like to choke sides up and with McGain they have the perfect man for the job.
His 2 for 64 is not his sexiest figures, but with Hodge getting out the crab Katich and Siddle chipping in with the new ball they are 4 down with 180 odd to get.
They do bat down to 9 in this game, but I suppose that is always going to happen when you don’t pick any bowlers.
Game is well poised but you’d rather be wearing Victorias shoes at this stage.
McGain only needs 3 wickets to complete his 5 wicket haul.
Clinton McKay only needs 5 to do the same.
Beau Casson is in, so that’s a positive.
It wasn’t pretty, and the tail had to fight a bit, and some bloke called Cameron got a swag full of wickets.
Then NSWales got in and batted like they were batting for time.
Their failure to take more than 2 specialist bowlers into this side mean that first innings points is really important.
But the Vics like to choke sides up and with McGain they have the perfect man for the job.
His 2 for 64 is not his sexiest figures, but with Hodge getting out the crab Katich and Siddle chipping in with the new ball they are 4 down with 180 odd to get.
They do bat down to 9 in this game, but I suppose that is always going to happen when you don’t pick any bowlers.
Game is well poised but you’d rather be wearing Victorias shoes at this stage.
McGain only needs 3 wickets to complete his 5 wicket haul.
Clinton McKay only needs 5 to do the same.
Beau Casson is in, so that’s a positive.
day one from bizzaro world
I hate catches down the leg side.
I can never tell if they are out, and it’s just a sh1t way for a batsman to go.
Today Hussey went out on the last ball before tea, caught down the leg side, off Dominic Thornley.
If that isn’t enough to slit your wrists over, he was on 86.
Then Hodge does the same thing off Beau Casson, mind you his pain was less cause he made a ton.
Mind you by then Victoria had used the flat wicket to score more than enough runs for one day.
6 for 340 on the first day is better than a slap in the face from an angry woman.
Yet again the money men held us up, but at least Whitey made a fair dinkum contribution and we still have McDonald to bat with the tail.
The weirdest thing for the whole day goes to the NSWelsh and their selection process.
The game was played at the SCG, as far as I’m aware. And yet when Matthew Nicholson, the 52 year old fast bowler, got ill before the game they replaced him with a debutant opening batsmen to bat at number 6.
Good luck to Usman Khawaja, but he obviously wasn’t going to take the new ball.
I’m glad the kid got a go, but isn’t it odd, that they would replace a bowler with a batsman.
NSWales only has 2 full time bowlers in this side, the game they have to win to get a home final, how stupid is that.
Beau Casson had none for 58 off ten at one stage, he may have been a full time bowler once upon a time, but no more.
Moises Enriques is a kid with more talent than Spiderman, but he is still young and is nowhere near a first tier bowler.
So if it is a home game, and Nicholson came down with the sniffles, why would they not replace him with another bowler, it defies all logic, unless we are in bizzarro world, are we in bizzaro world?
The Vics are in a good position, but their bowling line up scares me.
McKay and Pattinson may be good bowlers, but at this stage I do not have a zealotry belief in their talents.
However if we get to 450 tomorrow and then bowl them out for 83 I’ll prostrate myself before them.
I can never tell if they are out, and it’s just a sh1t way for a batsman to go.
Today Hussey went out on the last ball before tea, caught down the leg side, off Dominic Thornley.
If that isn’t enough to slit your wrists over, he was on 86.
Then Hodge does the same thing off Beau Casson, mind you his pain was less cause he made a ton.
Mind you by then Victoria had used the flat wicket to score more than enough runs for one day.
6 for 340 on the first day is better than a slap in the face from an angry woman.
Yet again the money men held us up, but at least Whitey made a fair dinkum contribution and we still have McDonald to bat with the tail.
The weirdest thing for the whole day goes to the NSWelsh and their selection process.
The game was played at the SCG, as far as I’m aware. And yet when Matthew Nicholson, the 52 year old fast bowler, got ill before the game they replaced him with a debutant opening batsmen to bat at number 6.
Good luck to Usman Khawaja, but he obviously wasn’t going to take the new ball.
I’m glad the kid got a go, but isn’t it odd, that they would replace a bowler with a batsman.
NSWales only has 2 full time bowlers in this side, the game they have to win to get a home final, how stupid is that.
Beau Casson had none for 58 off ten at one stage, he may have been a full time bowler once upon a time, but no more.
Moises Enriques is a kid with more talent than Spiderman, but he is still young and is nowhere near a first tier bowler.
So if it is a home game, and Nicholson came down with the sniffles, why would they not replace him with another bowler, it defies all logic, unless we are in bizzarro world, are we in bizzaro world?
The Vics are in a good position, but their bowling line up scares me.
McKay and Pattinson may be good bowlers, but at this stage I do not have a zealotry belief in their talents.
However if we get to 450 tomorrow and then bowl them out for 83 I’ll prostrate myself before them.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Brad's Vs David
In the Victorian Herald Sun today there is just a little tid bit about Haddin, Hodge and Hussey and who could be in the one day side.
They compare one day domestic records, where Hodge and Hussey tower above Haddin.
I think my love for Future PM Hussey is will known, and my hate for all players named Brad is equally well known.
This may come as a shock to you, but I think Brad Haddin should be playing in this one day series.
Brad managed to get into the Australian team last year, he did so by making a lot of runs quickly.
Then with injuries he found himself playing in India in the 7 match series that made no sense.
In that series his average of 66 in 4 games was only second to the man they called monkey.
He was on fire that series, while the other Brad made 59 runs in 7 matches at 9.
This is why Brad Haddin has been picked ahead of Brad Hodge in this series.
As for why Haddin has been picked ahead of Hussey it’s this simple, a) he is going to be a full time member of this side and this is good practice, and b) he made 200 runs at 66 in his last series so dropping him for a debutant, even one as God like as David Hussey is a big call.
When Gilly goes another batting slot will open up and the Future PM is the obvious choice for it.
If he doesn’t get picked then, and Bryce doesn’t get picked for a tour soon, I suggest all Victorians bum rush the Cricket Australia headquarters next to the G and burn that fu©ker down.
I have my pitch fork ready, but until then, chillax Victoria.
They compare one day domestic records, where Hodge and Hussey tower above Haddin.
I think my love for Future PM Hussey is will known, and my hate for all players named Brad is equally well known.
This may come as a shock to you, but I think Brad Haddin should be playing in this one day series.
Brad managed to get into the Australian team last year, he did so by making a lot of runs quickly.
Then with injuries he found himself playing in India in the 7 match series that made no sense.
In that series his average of 66 in 4 games was only second to the man they called monkey.
He was on fire that series, while the other Brad made 59 runs in 7 matches at 9.
This is why Brad Haddin has been picked ahead of Brad Hodge in this series.
As for why Haddin has been picked ahead of Hussey it’s this simple, a) he is going to be a full time member of this side and this is good practice, and b) he made 200 runs at 66 in his last series so dropping him for a debutant, even one as God like as David Hussey is a big call.
When Gilly goes another batting slot will open up and the Future PM is the obvious choice for it.
If he doesn’t get picked then, and Bryce doesn’t get picked for a tour soon, I suggest all Victorians bum rush the Cricket Australia headquarters next to the G and burn that fu©ker down.
I have my pitch fork ready, but until then, chillax Victoria.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Matthew Elliott - an odd genius
I was at his Matthew Elliot’s breakthrough innings at the G.He absolutely slaughtered the warriors in that game, and my old man mentions that innings in the same hushed tones he uses for Sobers double century.
He couldn’t have been much older than 21.
Over the years I must have seen Elliot make at least 10 centuries, and the same question seemed to come back to me over and over again, how can a player this good not make it internationally.
Elliott had a weird career. He had seasons where he was the best opener in the world, and others where he found odd ways to go out, including once getting stumped off funky miller by a silly mid off fielder.
His international career was stopped by two non form related incidents, one involving his famous crash with Mark Waugh and subsequent knee injury, and the other one that involved him breaking the players code of what happens on tour never ever ever ever makes it back to the players wives.
The international highlights for me, was the way he pulled Allan Donald in his tour of South Africa, where he was given the number 3 role. He clearly didn’t like it, but that one innings of 80odd, including perhaps the best pull shot I have ever seen, was worth it for me.
His Ashes tour, sure he was only playing an England A side in those days, but the hundred at Lords and the 199 at Leeds were awesome. His other ton was against the Kiwis and was the ugliest innings ever, it was very rare he would score runs ugly, I think he got dropped a bunch of times and then McMillan got him.
The best thing about those innings was he wasn’t even in top form, because when he was on best form, it was impossible to get him out.
Years earlier when he was at the cricket academy Dennis Lillee was advising all the bowlers of each batsmen’s weakness. When they asked him about Elliott, he said he couldn’t find one.
As a batsmen he was truly amazing, but a man as quiet and sensitive as he was not made for a team sport.
From early on there were always whispers he didn’t fit in, he was an intense guy, his team mates didn’t get him, and that his sense of humour was odd at best.
If batting was turned into an individual pursuit sport, he would have been one of the best of all time.
My favourite innings, and perhaps the best innings I have ever seen was a hundred he made against NSWales. The bowling list included Stuart Clark, Nathan Bracken and Stuey MacGill and he treated them like they were one legged lepers with two left arms.
Behind me that day was former Chairman of selectors Trevor Hohns, and I spent all day reminding him that Elliott was a superstar batting.
He played a test against Bangladesh after that, and then even Victoria didn’t want him and he was shipped off to the wasteland known as South Australian cricket.
From the age of 12 to 16 he was my favourite cricketer, he took over from Dean Jones and was replaced by Ian Harvey.
I have almost forgiven him for playing for the Redbacks, but I would like to thank him for some of the best innings I will ever see.
for a home final
Victoria find themselves in a battle against NSWales for the home ground advantage in the pura Sheffield cup Shield final.
Sides just don’t win shield finals away from home.
So the Vics have to beat the NSWelsh at their home ground starting Friday.
The NSWales team is missing a few regulars, Bracken and Haddin have been big time players all year, Smith and Hughes are off playing for the Australian under 19 side.
This week we need some old school, darren berry/slug jordan style cricket this week.
I can't stand losing to this mob at the best of times, but i'll be damned if we lose to this cobbled together team and lose the final because of it.
I think Crosthwaite should come in to provide some Luke Ronchi style catching and his witty little sledges to ensure victory.
If we lose this game, we probably don’t deserve to win the shield final, but our team, while still injury interrupted, still looks stronger than the speedblitz blues.
Victoria has a chance to write their names into the record books, being the first team to win two championships that no one cares about and one that everyone does in the one year.
They have been, by far the best 2020 team and 4 day team all year. Their one day form is pretty ordinary, but somehow they have found themselves in a position to play in or even host the final.
I had a coach once who said this “you remember two things in sport, when you win, and when you should have won”.
Victoria we expect nothing less than a total annihilation of this depleted Nsw side, but we understand you will collapse one or twice just to keep us interested.
And congrats to the young pakistani kid Usman Khawaja, who has been picked for NSWales, i understand he probably will be 12th man, but if he plays i hope he fails, no offence kid, but this is war.
Sides just don’t win shield finals away from home.
So the Vics have to beat the NSWelsh at their home ground starting Friday.
The NSWales team is missing a few regulars, Bracken and Haddin have been big time players all year, Smith and Hughes are off playing for the Australian under 19 side.
This week we need some old school, darren berry/slug jordan style cricket this week.
I can't stand losing to this mob at the best of times, but i'll be damned if we lose to this cobbled together team and lose the final because of it.
I think Crosthwaite should come in to provide some Luke Ronchi style catching and his witty little sledges to ensure victory.
If we lose this game, we probably don’t deserve to win the shield final, but our team, while still injury interrupted, still looks stronger than the speedblitz blues.
Victoria has a chance to write their names into the record books, being the first team to win two championships that no one cares about and one that everyone does in the one year.
They have been, by far the best 2020 team and 4 day team all year. Their one day form is pretty ordinary, but somehow they have found themselves in a position to play in or even host the final.
I had a coach once who said this “you remember two things in sport, when you win, and when you should have won”.
Victoria we expect nothing less than a total annihilation of this depleted Nsw side, but we understand you will collapse one or twice just to keep us interested.
And congrats to the young pakistani kid Usman Khawaja, who has been picked for NSWales, i understand he probably will be 12th man, but if he plays i hope he fails, no offence kid, but this is war.
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
New Texas defeated
Ashley Noffke turned out to be more benign than I thought, and therefore the Vics won easy.
The Mc's all took wickets, the pressure they put on the Bulls was quite good, the perssure the bulls put on themselves was unbelievable. They scraped to 200odd.
Then after a small yet slightly scary collapse (3/50), Brad Hodge and Cameron white saved our @sses.
Hodge made a pretty cruisey hundred, and while he did most of the damage, White kept his huge county bat sheathed until he deemed it necessary to slog some quick runs.
And did he slog, he hit some balls that are so scra4ed the ball's children will grow up petrified.
It was a welcome return to form for both men, who while they haven't been out of form, they haven't been their usual belligerent selves.
Also good to see the Vics win easily with Future Pm David Hussey pretty much a spectator.
Clinton McKay still worries me. He just seems loose, and not the in the bimbo sense of the word, but in a fast bowling I think he can get hit for a big shot at any time.
He is getting wickets so I am happy to say this is more my issue than anyone elses, but when he takes the new ball I feel a little nervy.
The Mc's all took wickets, the pressure they put on the Bulls was quite good, the perssure the bulls put on themselves was unbelievable. They scraped to 200odd.
Then after a small yet slightly scary collapse (3/50), Brad Hodge and Cameron white saved our @sses.
Hodge made a pretty cruisey hundred, and while he did most of the damage, White kept his huge county bat sheathed until he deemed it necessary to slog some quick runs.
And did he slog, he hit some balls that are so scra4ed the ball's children will grow up petrified.
It was a welcome return to form for both men, who while they haven't been out of form, they haven't been their usual belligerent selves.
Also good to see the Vics win easily with Future Pm David Hussey pretty much a spectator.
Clinton McKay still worries me. He just seems loose, and not the in the bimbo sense of the word, but in a fast bowling I think he can get hit for a big shot at any time.
He is getting wickets so I am happy to say this is more my issue than anyone elses, but when he takes the new ball I feel a little nervy.
Our navy blue hope
Dearest Bryce,
We think you’re really cool.
We don’t care what other people say, you are the coolest mother fu©ker on the planet.
Way cooler than say, Ian Thorpe or Hulk Hogan.
From now on we pledge allegiance to you, and only you.
Victoria needs an Australian test player.
We have all given up hope of Brad Hodge being reselected, everyone except him and Ponting seem to as well.
Future Pm David Hussey is a great guy, we all love him, but he must have slept with every selector’s daughter.
Every other good player for the Vics is made of ice cream, and therefore is no chance of selection.
The onus is on you.
At the moment you are doing your thing, and doing it nicely.
2/29 against the Bulls at the G with 3 maidens, you choked the bulls, which makes all Victorians happy.
Junior Waugh and AB were fondling themselves over your bowling, that can’t be a bad thing.
We the Victorian public are behind you, and by that I mean the 43 of us who have heard of you.
We are willing to do anything we can to get you across the line for Pakistan or the Caribbean.
Firstly we have decided to stop calling you old. Through the positive thinking seminars we have learnt that by calling you old, which you are, people start to think of you as old. Now we shall call you experienced, mature or battle hardened.
Secondly, we formed a committee, at this stage we haven’t registered an ABN, or held any meetings, but we do have a cool name.
Thirdly, well actually that is all we have so far, but Stuart and George came up with some, the former started his own wine show, and the latter let two part timers out bowl him.
And they are both West Australians, so the love is Australia wide Bryce.
Just keep giving us the wickets and we will start a nation wide campaign that will get you selected in something, either Cleo bachelor of the year or the Australian test team, right at the moment, we’ll take either.
Yours sincerely,
Send CWB's Nice Bryce To The Australian Test Team As First Spinner Committee 2008.
We think you’re really cool.
We don’t care what other people say, you are the coolest mother fu©ker on the planet.
Way cooler than say, Ian Thorpe or Hulk Hogan.
From now on we pledge allegiance to you, and only you.
Victoria needs an Australian test player.
We have all given up hope of Brad Hodge being reselected, everyone except him and Ponting seem to as well.
Future Pm David Hussey is a great guy, we all love him, but he must have slept with every selector’s daughter.
Every other good player for the Vics is made of ice cream, and therefore is no chance of selection.
The onus is on you.
At the moment you are doing your thing, and doing it nicely.
2/29 against the Bulls at the G with 3 maidens, you choked the bulls, which makes all Victorians happy.
Junior Waugh and AB were fondling themselves over your bowling, that can’t be a bad thing.
We the Victorian public are behind you, and by that I mean the 43 of us who have heard of you.
We are willing to do anything we can to get you across the line for Pakistan or the Caribbean.
Firstly we have decided to stop calling you old. Through the positive thinking seminars we have learnt that by calling you old, which you are, people start to think of you as old. Now we shall call you experienced, mature or battle hardened.
Secondly, we formed a committee, at this stage we haven’t registered an ABN, or held any meetings, but we do have a cool name.
Thirdly, well actually that is all we have so far, but Stuart and George came up with some, the former started his own wine show, and the latter let two part timers out bowl him.
And they are both West Australians, so the love is Australia wide Bryce.
Just keep giving us the wickets and we will start a nation wide campaign that will get you selected in something, either Cleo bachelor of the year or the Australian test team, right at the moment, we’ll take either.
Yours sincerely,
Send CWB's Nice Bryce To The Australian Test Team As First Spinner Committee 2008.
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
single gunman theory
While the rest of you Victorians are whining into your VB over the fact David Hussey is still not a real Australian player, I have found a real conspiracy theory.
Ashley Animatrix Noffke has been flicked away from the national side so he can destroy Victoria’s hopes of hosting the One day final.
Noffke’s performances against all comers this year has been of Spiderman quality, when he plays against Victoria, he becomes Batman.
He is obviously some sort of hired assassin sent by corrupt NSWelsh & Queensland administracrats to send Victoria back to the dark age.
Perhaps this is how he became so good, when before he was shocking. Some sort of new drug aimed at making you a demon allrounder when before you were a bum medium pacer.
Maybe they gave him a shot of Keith Miller blood in some sort of hooded ritual.
Just so they could beat the vics, those bastards.
The decision to drop him is odd in a cricket sense, as Stuart Clark is not a one day bowler, and Ashley Noffke is an allrounder of at least the same one day bowling potential.
So it is obviously a decision made to hurt Victorians.
Following this game the Vics play New south Wales, if Clark is dropped by then and plays against the Vics I will start a revolution.
Don’t think I wont.
Ashley Animatrix Noffke has been flicked away from the national side so he can destroy Victoria’s hopes of hosting the One day final.
Noffke’s performances against all comers this year has been of Spiderman quality, when he plays against Victoria, he becomes Batman.
He is obviously some sort of hired assassin sent by corrupt NSWelsh & Queensland administracrats to send Victoria back to the dark age.
Perhaps this is how he became so good, when before he was shocking. Some sort of new drug aimed at making you a demon allrounder when before you were a bum medium pacer.
Maybe they gave him a shot of Keith Miller blood in some sort of hooded ritual.
Just so they could beat the vics, those bastards.
The decision to drop him is odd in a cricket sense, as Stuart Clark is not a one day bowler, and Ashley Noffke is an allrounder of at least the same one day bowling potential.
So it is obviously a decision made to hurt Victorians.
Following this game the Vics play New south Wales, if Clark is dropped by then and plays against the Vics I will start a revolution.
Don’t think I wont.
Sunday, February 3, 2008
Adam's helmet saves the day
I’m not going to go on and on about Victoria's very lucky win last night.
Mostly because the way they batted they would prefer me not too.
Wouldn’t want to offend anyone or bruise some egos.
I will say that they had the game completely in the grasp on a very tricky pitch but then that they batted themselves into a hole that only Crosthwaite’s helmet could get them out of.
Adam (x) charged down the wicket with 2 required with 3 balls and 2 wickets in hand and helmeted the ball away for a single to tie the scores, before Peter Siddle got the last run.
With X the Vics would have lost a game that should never have even been close.
X was booed at all times when he batted, but unlike Channel 9, Foxtel showed the boos and embraced them.
Future Pm David Hussey proved again that no matter what the surface is like, he can make runs. He batted so much better than any other batsmen in the game.
Cameron White was played back into form by a weird Marcus North decision to not bring on the quicks.
The commentators were going nuts about it, I have to agree, Tait and Malinga have gotten him with full quick straight ones recently and Edmondson is their side just for such an occasion.
One of White’s sixes has just entered Orbit.
Earlier in the day, the Vics bowled really well to restrict the very talented warriors batting line up to only 220 odd.
Cameron is finally bowling well again, in the words of my father, he was robbed of the plumbest LB’s and then got a shocker when he was batting.
Pattison did well again, which just proves that if you give a Victorian a blue top and tell him to bowl quick and he will do a good job.
The Vics were very very very lucky to win this, especially with Crosthwaite and McDonald making some very odd decisions at the end.
They have played some ordinary one day cricket this year and still look like making the finals.
That makes me happy.
Mostly because the way they batted they would prefer me not too.
Wouldn’t want to offend anyone or bruise some egos.
I will say that they had the game completely in the grasp on a very tricky pitch but then that they batted themselves into a hole that only Crosthwaite’s helmet could get them out of.
Adam (x) charged down the wicket with 2 required with 3 balls and 2 wickets in hand and helmeted the ball away for a single to tie the scores, before Peter Siddle got the last run.
With X the Vics would have lost a game that should never have even been close.
X was booed at all times when he batted, but unlike Channel 9, Foxtel showed the boos and embraced them.
Future Pm David Hussey proved again that no matter what the surface is like, he can make runs. He batted so much better than any other batsmen in the game.
Cameron White was played back into form by a weird Marcus North decision to not bring on the quicks.
The commentators were going nuts about it, I have to agree, Tait and Malinga have gotten him with full quick straight ones recently and Edmondson is their side just for such an occasion.
One of White’s sixes has just entered Orbit.
Earlier in the day, the Vics bowled really well to restrict the very talented warriors batting line up to only 220 odd.
Cameron is finally bowling well again, in the words of my father, he was robbed of the plumbest LB’s and then got a shocker when he was batting.
Pattison did well again, which just proves that if you give a Victorian a blue top and tell him to bowl quick and he will do a good job.
The Vics were very very very lucky to win this, especially with Crosthwaite and McDonald making some very odd decisions at the end.
They have played some ordinary one day cricket this year and still look like making the finals.
That makes me happy.
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